Akbar Kurtha

AK: It was a difficult childhood for a few reasons. Partly because where we lived, partly because of schooling, and partly because of sort of parents. Where we lived, we lived in Brixton, so, you know, it was kind of...I don't know, I just...it was just a very...it was a council estate, you know, and I think we were probably one of about three or four Asian families on this estate. And, you know, you...the kind of...I sort of remember walls being sprayed with NF and, you know, all that kind of stuff. I mean, it's all very vague, but those are the kind of the images that kind of come to mind. And, you know, the kind of sort of term Paki, you know, it was quite a commonly used one. So you knew, you know, from very early on that there was something supposedly wrong with you. You know, you weren't accepted, you didn't fit in. And then also I'd kind of go to school, and then it would be the same sort of thing, you know? And I remember there were a lot of Black kids around, but there weren't as many Asian kids, so, you know, it was just a thing of kind of sort of, again, you know, kind of being called names and all that kind of stuff. Same thing on the estate, nobody really wanted to play with you, you know, had to try and fit in, you know?

PM: You mentioned from an early age, you know, being really kind of aware of who you were, because of this name calling, being an Asian when there weren't many Asians. That's a lot of profound stuff really for a young kid of perhaps 8 years old or whatever.

AK: Yeah. I mean, you just kind of get on with it and you deal with it, don't you? You don't know...you don't really understand it, you just seem to think that that's the way it is. And you sort of fight...I think every now and then you fight back. But then I think even that you kind of get tired of as well, you know? And so I sort of...I think I was always a bit of a loner. It's funny, something else that kind of came to my mind was that sort of around that age I think even the TV was full of sort of ridiculous things like Love Thy Neighbour and Mind Your Language. So, you know, we're always kind of sort of the butt of everybody's joke. And, you know, sometimes it was funny, but generally not, you know? So, yeah, I mean, with hindsight, I sort of look back on, you know, my childhood, and I think, God, you know, I did have a lot to deal with. And it probably explains, you know, why I am the way that I am today and I do the things that I do. But, you know, you just have to kind of live with that, really.

PM: What identity do you give yourself? I mean, and what does it mean to you? Has that changed over time?

AK: It has changed. You see, I started off saying I was British, because obviously that suited. Then I...this is sort of as my professional life as an actor, I did a show which was called Do It with Your Fingers, which is like a sketch comedy show. And as we were working on that, we were sort of saying, well...because a lot of us had similar experiences, you know, in terms of identity and stuff. And we said, so what are we? You know, we tried to pin it down. And we came up with this word British Asian, you know? So, you know, that's how we defined ourselves. We said, we are British Asian. And what we meant by that is that we are British by birth, we are British by experience, right, but we are also Asian. And it was just trying to kind of find some sort of equality within that, but saying that, you know, we are 50-50. And both parts are important. You know, it's neither one thing or the other, but one can't go without the other either. Because that's just who we are, we're second-generation British Asian kids. Since then, and this is again, you know...and I do find this through my work, actually, that, you know, there is, you know, kind of a...you kind of...you occasionally learn things about the world and learn things about humanity and all that kind of stuff. And I did a show recently, so this is kind of sort of four or five years on since we've done the British Asian thing. And this play was written by this young playwright who was questioning whether it was possible to be British Asian in 1998. Just a very quick breakdown of the story. Asian rock star, Cool Britannia, he sells out. So he's kind of started off with this sort of a...you know, kind of a political thing, sells out, becomes a boy band, makes it big in America. And somebody calls him a Paki in the audience, right? So the whole thing just falls apart. The question that that play was bringing about was that in 1998, with Cool Britannia, you know, will we really be accepted? Fully, right? And the answer that seemed to be coming out wa, not fully. So if not fully, then can we honestly say that we'll be accepted as British Asians? Right. And again, the answer is, as far as Cool Britannia is concerned, no, unless you’ve got money, unless you can serve the system. And all this was kind of coming from kind of, sort of, you know, in reality, what is the likelihood of seeing a Black or Asian, particularly an Asian, prime minister in this country in the next ten years? And it ain't going to happen. It isn't going to happen. So, if that isn't there as a possibility, can we honestly say that we are 50-50 and we are part of the cosmetic and we are all that kind of stuff? Now, this now makes me sound like a real rebel, and like, no, I'm becoming a real kind of sort of Asian fundamentalist of some sort, you know? And I'm not at all. But all I'm saying is, I am now questioning the label or the title that I was a part of creating.

Entry credit

Laura Owen